Take a good look at the whole situation.  Was it something you did, or something you didn’t do?  Was it your fault or was it your partners fault?  Rule out what you have no control over and focus on the things you can change.  If you decide that the problem is something that you caused and that you can change, then you probably can get back together if you are willing to make the necessary changes to make it work.

Now you need to take action to get your ex back.  Don’t act needy and definitely don’t act desperate.  You may need to minimize your contact with them for a while.  This will allow your ex some time to think and to realize how much they miss you.  When you do communicate, be a good listener.  This is the key to finding out exactly what they are thinking.  Be sweet and kind but not pushy.  Casually bring up some of the good times that you had together.  Make them think about all the wonderful memories you shared.

You also need to get out and socialize.  Not dating, but just going out with friends.  When your ex sees you going out, they will realize you are not just sitting home moping and they may start to worry.

This is going to be a stressful and trying time for you, but you will get through it.  Try to slowly open the lines of communication. If you both can be honest about your feelings, you should have a better relationship than before the breakup.

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To prepare physically, you just need to look the best that you can. This will give you more confidence. You know the routine – haircut, nails trimmed and clean, clothes ironed and clean, teeth clean and white, cleanly shaved, and all the other grooming necessary to make you look good. Make sure you always look your best when you go out – you never know who you’ll meet.

You must feel confident and relaxed enough to be able to enjoy a date. If you have issues from a previous involvement, these should be addressed and resolved before you start dating again. You need to give yourself some quiet time alone and close out that relationship for good. Daily meditation can do wonders for helping resolve issues.

Now you just need to get out. It’s as simple as that. Start doing activities that you enjoy. Go out with friends. Join clubs. The more you are out, the better chance you have of finding someone. You’ll find that when your friends and family know that you are ready to start dating again, they will start looking to fix you up with someone they know. Dating services are an option to think about. They match your personalities up so you can find someone who is compatible and likes to do the same things you do.

Think positive – have fun and the right person will soon find you.

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People have a tendency to try to be the person that they think their date wants them to be.  They feel that they will hook them in and then they can go back to their normal selves.  This is a big mistake.  If your date is not attracted to the real you, then you need to find someone else.

If it is a matter of your self esteem, and you think that no one will be attracted to the real you, then you need to work on this before you get involved in a serious relationship.   It is important to feel good about yourself.  You need to have confidence in yourself and your ability to be a good partner.

Before your date, look in the mirror and give yourself a pep talk .  Tell yourself what a wonderful, loving, fun person you are.  Say that everyone that meets you falls in love with you.  Really play it up!!!  Give yourself a great big smile.  Feel better??

You also need to accept your date as they are.  Never think that you can change someone.   If their behavior is not acceptable to you, don’t think that you will work on changing them later.  It usually doesn’t happen, and you don’t have the right to try to change them anyway.  Don’t think that you must find someone who is absolutely perfect – that doesn’t happen either.  There is always some compromise in a relationship.

So take a deep breath, put a smile on your face and have a great date!!