Each person in a relationship needs to take time each day for themselves.  Time to do what they want to do and quiet time to reflect on how their life is going.  We live in such a hectic, people filled world, that it is essential to have some reflective time to ourselves.  Fifteen to thirty minutes of meditation a day can drastically improve every aspect of your life.  When you feel less stress, you are apt to be more patient and kind in your relationship.

If you can, it is helpful to get away together, even if it is just for one night.  When you are away, you can concentrate on each other without the interruptions you have at home.  It is somehow more romantic when you are away from home.  You feel more relaxed.  Try to get away at least a few times a year.  You will come home feeling like a new person.

It is essential that you each have your own friends and activities apart from each other.  Yes, it is important to spend time together, but it is also important to spend time apart.  You appreciate each other more when you  spend some time apart.

Say I love you often.  When you say it, also say why you love them.   We are in the habit of saying I love you  and sometimes it loses its meaning.  But when you add on why you love them, it makes it more meaningful.  As an example, you could say “I love you,  you are so patient with me”.  This also reminds you  of the many reasons you love your partner.

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Take a good look at the whole situation.  Was it something you did, or something you didn’t do?  Was it your fault or was it your partners fault?  Rule out what you have no control over and focus on the things you can change.  If you decide that the problem is something that you caused and that you can change, then you probably can get back together if you are willing to make the necessary changes to make it work.

Now you need to take action to get your ex back.  Don’t act needy and definitely don’t act desperate.  You may need to minimize your contact with them for a while.  This will allow your ex some time to think and to realize how much they miss you.  When you do communicate, be a good listener.  This is the key to finding out exactly what they are thinking.  Be sweet and kind but not pushy.  Casually bring up some of the good times that you had together.  Make them think about all the wonderful memories you shared.

You also need to get out and socialize.  Not dating, but just going out with friends.  When your ex sees you going out, they will realize you are not just sitting home moping and they may start to worry.

This is going to be a stressful and trying time for you, but you will get through it.  Try to slowly open the lines of communication. If you both can be honest about your feelings, you should have a better relationship than before the breakup.

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To prepare physically, you just need to look the best that you can. This will give you more confidence. You know the routine – haircut, nails trimmed and clean, clothes ironed and clean, teeth clean and white, cleanly shaved, and all the other grooming necessary to make you look good. Make sure you always look your best when you go out – you never know who you’ll meet.

You must feel confident and relaxed enough to be able to enjoy a date. If you have issues from a previous involvement, these should be addressed and resolved before you start dating again. You need to give yourself some quiet time alone and close out that relationship for good. Daily meditation can do wonders for helping resolve issues.

Now you just need to get out. It’s as simple as that. Start doing activities that you enjoy. Go out with friends. Join clubs. The more you are out, the better chance you have of finding someone. You’ll find that when your friends and family know that you are ready to start dating again, they will start looking to fix you up with someone they know. Dating services are an option to think about. They match your personalities up so you can find someone who is compatible and likes to do the same things you do.

Think positive – have fun and the right person will soon find you.

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People have a tendency to try to be the person that they think their date wants them to be.  They feel that they will hook them in and then they can go back to their normal selves.  This is a big mistake.  If your date is not attracted to the real you, then you need to find someone else.

If it is a matter of your self esteem, and you think that no one will be attracted to the real you, then you need to work on this before you get involved in a serious relationship.   It is important to feel good about yourself.  You need to have confidence in yourself and your ability to be a good partner.

Before your date, look in the mirror and give yourself a pep talk .  Tell yourself what a wonderful, loving, fun person you are.  Say that everyone that meets you falls in love with you.  Really play it up!!!  Give yourself a great big smile.  Feel better??

You also need to accept your date as they are.  Never think that you can change someone.   If their behavior is not acceptable to you, don’t think that you will work on changing them later.  It usually doesn’t happen, and you don’t have the right to try to change them anyway.  Don’t think that you must find someone who is absolutely perfect – that doesn’t happen either.  There is always some compromise in a relationship.

So take a deep breath, put a smile on your face and have a great date!!

The problem is if you are acting too anxious to get your ex back, you may be causing your ex to pull away. It is human nature to resist this type of pressure. And to struggle against human nature will only make things worse.

Are you smothering your ex? Do you call too much, constantly email or text message all the time? Do you try to make your ex feel sorry for you? If you are doing these things, you must stop immediately!

You need to try something different. Start by breaking off contact for a while and start living your life again. During this time you should focus on what you can do to improve your personal life, instead of focusing only on your relationship problems. This may prove to be difficult for you, but you must do it.

Since you will no longer be pursuing your ex, your ex is going to experience a shift in feelings. Your ex is now in a position to actually miss you. This will definitely work in your favor.

Once you implement this advice you can allow your ex to remember why you were in love.  Play hard to get and let your ex make the first move. Remember to give your ex some space to think.

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